Metal As Fukk Disney Villains

That pencil-stached creeper had a dark side, and not just because he hated blacks and Jews…
Jafar
The conniving sorcerer from Aladdin. Tried to bury an Arabian princess alive while her boyfriend watched. Trained his parrot to call him “Oh Mighty Evil One.” Never left his lair without his cobra staff and a perfectly coiffed goatee. Rocked enough guy-liner to make Vince Neil blush.
Scar
The scraggly, flamboyant king-slayer from the Lion King. His only friends were autistic (and borderline racist) hyenas. And he’s the only Disney character to score a not-so-subtle Hitler reference.
Ursula
The foul, nasty octo-pussy from the Little Mermaid. Probably had the darkest hobby in the history of cartoons: tricking mermaids into selling their souls, then keeping them locked in her bedroom for eternity. She’s like Ariel Castro with tentacles coming out of her twat

Maleficent

The green-faced, devil-horned sorceress from Sleeping Beauty. Conjures up “all the powers of hell” just to beat back a pansy-ass prince and refers to herself as the “Mistress of All Evil.” Good rule of thumb: never trust a chick with hands bigger than yours, even if it looks like she can work a staff.

Cruella DeVille
Homicidal puppy-killer from 101 Dalmatians. Looks like she just bumped a rail of the devil’s dandruff and chased it with nine Grey Goose martinis. And Christ, look at that hair. It’s like Marlyn Manson fukked a skunk.
Edgar Balthazar
The money-grubbing butler from the Aristocats. Tries to off a bunch of adorable kittens so he can steal a dying old man’s estate. Always rocks his evening tails, even when he’s trying to hack off Fifi’s tiny feline head.
Stromboli
Shifty gypsy puppeteer from Pinocchio with a killer temper and a gnarly Rasputin beard. If you make daddy some money tonight, he’ll let you sleep in the nice cage. If you don’t, he’ll chop you up and use you for firewood.
Professor Ratigan
The rat-tailed egomaniac criminal from The Great Mouse Detective. Has a merlot fountain and plays the harp. Penchant for long rants about manors and dignity, but once fed his loyal friend to a cat just because he referred to him as a rat. Oh, and he’s voiced by Vincent Muthafukkin’ Price.
Queen of Hearts
Psychotic tyrant of Wonderland whose only solution to problems is a public beheading. Planted my roses white instead of red? Off with your muthafukkin’ head. Made me miss my croquet shot? Off with your muthafukkin’ head. Look too long at my Fred Flintstone face? Your shit’s gonna roll, son.
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